Raphael-Leff suggests this boils down to our own childhood experiences and how (once upon a time) our own big feelings were handled or mishandled. There are many ways we as parents manage our kid’s tantrums. So what causes some parents to lock horns and others to disengage, many to disengage and other to verbalise all the mixed feelings. This results in a confrontation of sorts where our wild things meet theirs, anxiety rises and once anger subsides, guilt takes over. Either consciously or unconsciously it drums up our own “terrible roars” from childhood. When a child screams at you, this is extremely triggering and anxiety levels rise in both parties. What is often overlooked, she says, is the effect a child’s emotions has on the carers, and all the wild things they stir up within the grown-up. Psychoanalyst Joan Raphael-Leff, points out that this story acknowledges that when a child is in a crazed tantrum, they lose sight of all the good in that moment. It’s not just kids that feel wild … but adults too.At the end of the story Max realises that he can have the wild feelings in all their glory, but that mom will still love him and all his big feelings no matter what! This understanding that mom loves ALL of him, is what helps him pull himself back together and ultimately re-centres him. But it can feel pretty nasty to experience them. It’s important to remember that the wild feelings themselves are not so terrible – they are just feelings after all. Because what Max is really really doing is feeling his anger, riding out his “rumpus” thoughts, remembering what is good again and ultimately surviving it all. But don’t worry there’s hope…Īs the story goes, Max eventually tames the beasts “with a magic trick of staring into their yellow eyes without blinking once.” But this isn’t magic at all. Not because they’re bad, but because of how out of control they can feel when experienced, as if they could gobble you up if they get too big. The truth is that angry feelings can feel wild and terrifying. This doesn’t feel too far from the experience of an inconsolable toddler (for example) whose wild tantrum possesses his body and mind and no one can soothe him. These overwhelming feelings take him far away, over stormy seas and transport him into another dimension. In his imagination he meets the wild things who “roared their terrible roars and gnashed their terrible teeth and rolled their terrible eyes and showed their terrible claws.” Now while this presents as a dream of sorts, all this “terribleness” is actually a reference to Max’s enormous feelings of hostility and rage he is feeling in those moments. He is seething with anger and beyond furious with his mom. In the story misbehaving Max is sent to his room in an absolute flap. So what does Where The Wild Things Are teach us about tantrums? But then from far away across the world, Max smells good things to eat and longs for home where “someone loves him best of all.” For a full reading of this book click here. From there, Max sets sail to an island inhabited by the ferocious Wild Things, who name him king and share a wild rumpus with him. In the book little Max, dressed in his wolf-suit, is sent up to his room without supper for misbehaving. So here are three important messages in this beautifully sophisticated story. Buried deep in its storyline are meaningful truths about how to think carefully about tantrums and big scary feelings. Where The Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak is so much more than an adventurous tale. Sly definitely thinks about this stuff.Three Things that Where The Wild Things Are Teaches Us About Tantrums Rocky is the underdog-out-of-nowhere tale, “Rocky II” is about proving the success isn’t a fluke, “Rocky III” deals with the ambition-sapping challenge of superstardom, “Rocky IV” focuses on international stardom, “Rocky V” is about maintaining one’s credibility after immense failure, and “Rocky Balboa” finds Stallone and Balboa attempting to prove they’ve still got it despite being past their prime. Few would dispute that the five films in between “Rocky” and “Creed” are not up to the Best Picture-winning original, but those looking for intellectual value to excuse repeat viewings of these gloriously goofy follow-ups should consider this: Each Rocky film accurately reflects the state of Sylvester Stallone’s career at the time it was made. Conventional wisdom states that the first “Rocky” is a great film that, to its everlasting discredit, spawned a series of increasingly silly sequels (until Ryan Coogler redeemed the franchise with “Creed” in 2015).
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